Way To Go, Godot!

A nice, relaxed meal; a slow walk on a sunny spring day; time alone with loved ones. It’s an accepted wisdom that the little things in life are often the most enjoyable. The more you allow yourself to stay in the moment and focus in on the simple pleasures, the better your overall quality of life will be. We all know this already.

The problem lies in trying to remember this simple truth in the midst of all of life’s craziness. Most of us have so much going on in our lives that it seems like all we can do to keep our focus on the deadlines we have to meet, the objectives we have to reach, and the expectations we have to live up to. On top of that, most of us find ourselves surrounded by people who are at least as preoccupied with these things as we are, which reinforces our focus squarely on those things which have the least chance of making us happy right now, in this moment.

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Eric Puryear writes:

A fellow law student and I were debating the current issue of terrorist interrogation, and what practices would offend anti-torture aspects of the constitution and international treaties. The question came up as to whether any practice which compelled someone to speak against their will was torture (see the UN torture definition at the top of the page: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Torture). From a psychological perspective, what are your thoughts sir?

Photo by danny.hammontree

The definition you reference essentially says that any intentional infliction of severe pain or suffering is torture. And I think most people would generally agree. The problem is that no one seems to agree on how severe that suffering has to be. Is waterboarding severe enough? How about being tazed? Is sleep deprivation torture? Loud music? Bad food? Public humiliation? It all depends who you ask. The folks who have an interest in the torturing will usually say no, and the folks who are being tortured will probably always say yes.

I think the thing to understand here is that everyone sees themselves as the good guys. The torturer is defending god or country or freedom, and so is the recipient of the torture. The situation is hopeless. I recommend against involvement.

Let’s face it: if you’re reading this article, you’re probably not like the others. There has probably always been something a little different, maybe even a little awkward about you. But you used that difference as a strength; you took it as your permission to explore the world from new angles, and to develop yourself into the sort of person who keeps working to develop yourself. And you probably succeed in your personal development. You are probably much more motivated than the general public, much more likely to succeed in business, more likely to enjoy a happy family life and to age gracefully.

Carl Jung based much of his psychology on the idea that people and societies are fundamentally balanced, that each of us has all of the possible dramatic configurations and mythological motivations built in, and that they each have equal importance for our overall being. This means that the things that you really hate about other people are exactly the parts of yourself that you are trying to disavow. Jung called these parts the shadow.

That’s why I think it’s so important to watch CSI:Miami.

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In February, Alex Shalman had the great idea to explore what people mean when they say they want to be happy. The result was a list of five simple questions that formed the basis for bunch of really great interviews which you can read over at The Happiness Project page. What’s great about these interviews is not only finding out what motivates a number of very interesting and motivated individuals, but also the fact that in each one you can probably find some aspect of your own personal motivations. Reading through the interviews, I felt as though I were making contact with the positive natures of dozens of my own hidden personas.

Now I’d like to contribute to The Happiness Project by answering these questions myself, and by encouraging you to do the same.

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In my recent article on hypnosis, I mentioned fairly casually that we don’t live in the present moment. We live in memories and dreams.

This is an idea that will not be unfamiliar to those with a mystic bent, but the rest of you may suspect that there is some craziness going on here. In fact, there is! But it is a craziness that is supported by a lot of very good neurological and psychological research.

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Hypnosis is a sort of spooky and misunderstood phenomenon. Most of what people generally know about hypnosis comes from movies and stage performers, not real clinical hypnotists.

You may not even realize that clinical hypnosis is a very well-established and scientifically validated medical practice. It’s used by psychotherapists, physicians, nurses, dentists, and anesthesiologists to produce a profound sense of serenity in patients who might otherwise be really freaking out. As it turns out, hypnosis is an incredibly versatile and powerful psychological technique, so it would be in your best interests to know a little bit about it and to be open to the idea.

With that in mind, I’ll dispel some of the major myths about hypnosis and tell you some far-out realities about it as well:

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A million authors have written a million articles about amping up your creativity for a minute or two at a time. This article is different, because I intend to help you develop a full strategy for boosting your creativity whenever you need it and as much as you need.

The first thing to get a grasp of is exactly what creativity is. Creativity is novelty. When someone does something unexpected, we refer to that as a creative choice.

The only way to make unexpected decisions is to see some of the unexpected options which are open to you. This is what people tend to find the most difficult, because there is ultimately no way to really expect the unexpected. You have to find a way to open your eyes to something that has been in front of you all along. And that is creativity. Creativity is perspective.

So here’s how to open your eyes:

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